Abortion and its Violent Effect on Surviving Children

Philip G. Ney, MD, FRCP(C), MA, FRANZCP, RPsych

©1998 

*Tables are not included. For a full text and table version of this article, please contact us via: iiplcarr@islandnet.com 

Public and professionals alike are asking many questions about violence, but seldom see any connection with the most critical violence, that is, the wilful, paid dismemberment and destruction of a small, innocent human.  Surely we have learned that what we do to others we do to ourselves because we are all so tightly bound in the bundle of life.  Eventually the destruction of other humans kills our own humanity.  There is a cascading effect.  When the weakest and most vulnerable are first destroyed there is a progression that leads to increasingly powerful destruction so that in the end no one escapes.  

For many years it was stated that the first right of a child is to be wanted.  It was argued that if every child was wanted he/she would not be neglected and abused.  Although this appears to be a self-evident truth there should be some research to test this hypothesis, especially since it affects such a vast number of people.  The corollary to "every child must be wanted" is that if the child is not wanted, he has no right to be.  This, in fact, is becoming a policy in much of the world. 

For all the ills in Society, the most useful scapegoat is the person who is innocent, voiceless and unable to defend himself.  The unborn child is the perfect scapegoat.  But scapegoating never resolves the basic problems.  It eventually rebounds onto all those who are doing the scapegoating.  The others that suffer the most are the siblings of the terminated children.  These are people we call those who are suffering with the Post Abortion Survivor Syndrome. 

We found unresolved pregnancy losses interfere with bonding to subsequent children and consequently increase rates of abuse and neglect.  We also found that supportive physicians can, at least partially, compensate for the lack of partner support and thereby diminish the frequency of pregnancy losses and thus lower rates of mistreatment. 

As a child psychiatrist who has consulted in prisons for young offenders, it is not hard to see how violent and cruel young people can be.  Yet, when you listen to their stories it is not hard to understand why it happens.  There is a connection between how they have been treated and how they treat themselves and others. In addition to the clinical observations, we now have collected data that shows the link between various facets of abortion and how people become violent.  

Violence occurs in a tragic triangle involving a Perpetrator, Victim and Observer.  The Observers frequently have the most critical part, and yet when confronted they are most likely to say they didn't know and could have done nothing to stop the tragedy.  This triangle rotates with time and circumstance so that very frequently those who are Observers or Victims become Perpetrators and Perpetrators become Victims.  In matters of life and death there are no innocent bystanders, even though the bystanders try so hard to convince themselves that they are innocent by scapegoating either the Perpetrator or the Victim. 

No one has yet proved that providing means to ensure that every child is wanted has diminished the rate of abuse and neglect.  There is some demographic evidence to the contrary [1]. In Canadian provinces where the abortion rate is the highest, the child abuse rate is also the highest.  The increase in child abuse rate in Canada corresponds with the introduction of liberalised abortion. 

From our ongoing study of the causes and effects of child abuse and neglect we have found that:

1) In less than 5% of the cases does child mistreatment occur in one form, i.e. 95% of children are affected by various combinations of abuse and neglect.  The most damaging combinations include some form of neglect.

2) Depending on the type and severity of the child abuse or neglect, there is a 30-50% chance the mistreatment will become transgenerational.  Verbal abuse is most frequently passed on from one generation to the next.

3) The best model to explain mistreatment interactions is a triangle that involves a perpetrator, victim, and observer.  This triangle rotates with time and circumstances.

4) Children tend to blame themselves to varying degrees, depending upon the severity and type of abuse.  They are most likely to blame themselves for verbal and sexual abuse.

5) Mistreatment affects the child's self-perception and his outlook on the world.  It tends to make children suicidal, pessimistic about the future, and negative about themselves.  Children who were physically abused tend to expect a violent death.

6) When given a variety of choices regarding causation, children tend to attribute mistreatment most frequently to parental immaturity and then to marital conflict, alcohol, unemployment, etc.

7) When abuse is preceded by neglect the damaging impact is greater.  Neglect appears to make children both more susceptible and more vulnerable to mistreatment.

8) Abuse is not related to wantedness except inversely.  Wantedness appears to change during pregnancy and is lowest during the first trimester.  

9) Women who have had unresolved abortions more frequently abuse and neglect children.  Women who have been mistreated as children are more likely to have abortions.

10)  Post-abortion women more often respond to a child's cry with feelings of anger, anxiety or helplessness.

11) Being abused by her partner is a better predictor of child abuse by a mother than the fact that she was abused as a child.  Mothers tend to be mistreated by their partner as they were abused as a child.

12) Unresolved problems stemming from mistreatment in childhood are re-enacted later in life in order to understand the underlying conflicts and thus improve the efficiency of the human organism.

13)  Verbal abuse is more frequently transgenerational than physical or sexual abuse, possibly because it becomes ego syntonic.

14) The most important causes of mistreatment, as determined by a stepwise regression analysis of the 66 factors we considered, were husband not being supportive, lack of breast feeding, and pregnancy losses. 

In a multi-centre, trans-cultural study of the impact of pregnancy loss on health [8] we have found that:

1) All kinds of unmourned pregnancy losses interfere with physical and emotional health, probably because prolonged grief suppresses the immune system.

2) Abortion appears to be a more difficult type of pregnancy loss to mourn and thus it has a more deleterious impact on health.

3) The rates of miscarriage and abortion are closely correlated with the amount of partner support.

4) The damaging effects of pregnancy losses are cumulative.

5) If the numbers of abortions are subtracted from teenage pregnancies, the 14-19 year old group has as many full term, normal birth weight, healthy babies as any other age group.

6) The factor that seems to determine a high number of abortions in teenagers is their very low rate of partner support.

7) Abortion interferes with bonding, touching and breast feeding the child after an abortion. 

We hypothesise that:

1) Some apparent connection between wantedness and child abuse is post-hoc.  People associate the memory of abuse with the feeling that they were neglected, and were therefore unwanted as children.

2) Any connection between child abuse and unwantedness is dependant on the common variable of partner support which determines both.

3) wanting children may contribute to the problem of mistreatment because:

a) Higher expectations are placed on them. Therefore, they are more disappointing and more frequently disciplined.

b) Being a chosen or wanted child creates a great burden for him or her.

c) Being a wanted child, surviving when others do not, results in a clinical syndrome with a definable constellation of signs and symptoms.

d) It encourages selective feticide, which raises in the mind of a child doubts about his/her existence and his/her parents' capacity to love him/her.

4)  When children doubt or mistrust their parents, it makes parenting more difficult. 

As part of an ongoing study of the causes and effects of childhood mistreatment, we have been collecting data on children in a variety of settings. These include two private child psychiatric practices, a young offenders' centre, a psychiatric unit for children and adolescents, and a regular high school.  We have also collected data from adults mistreated as children and from parents of mistreated children.  Visual analogue scale (v.a.s.) ratings of children and adults on themselves and each other, plus ratings provided by the ward staff, were used to assess the frequency, duration, intensity, self blame, damaging effect, etc., of mistreatment.  The v.a.s. were tested for validity and reliability and found to be satisfactory.  We found the v.a.s. questions are easier to answer as they are able to reflect the full continuum of mistreatment. There are additional questions answered with a brief statement. The data is coded and analysed at the Academic Computing Services of the University of Calgary. 

Table 1 indicates that wantedness changes during the pregnancy and is lowest in the first trimester.  It appears that wantedness is not related to the extent of abuse.  Table 2 indicates that abuse and wantedness are related to the amount of spousal support.  Tables 3 and 4 show the relationship between wantedness and child abuse and support of the partner and child abuse. It appears that wantedness is more closely correlated with neglect and neglect with partner support.

Figures 1 and 2 indicate the three most important causes, from the child's point of view, of his mistreatment.  It appears that children most frequently ascribe immaturity of parents as the most important cause.  Table 5 indicates that mothers who have had abortions more frequently respond with anxiety, anger, sadness, or helplessness to a child's cry to different types of mistreatment.  Physical neglect seems to correlate closely with mother's helpless response to the child's cry.

Table 6 shows the results of a stepwise regression analysis of the 66 factors considered as possibly related to mistreatment.  It indicates that, among the most prevalent factors, lack of breast feeding, lack of supportive husband, and losses are among the most important causes.

Table 7 shows the correlation between the amount of touch and breast feeding.  Table 8 shows the connections between how cuddly a child is and how often it may be mistreated.  Table 9 indicates the connection between childhood mistreatment and marital status.  Single parents are more likely to abuse or neglect their children. 

Table 10 shows the distribution of responses to the questions "how well has your mother or father looked after you?" and "how was your childhood?"  Table 11 indicates factors determined by a stepwise analysis of variants associated with more or less abuse.  Family break-up and parental maturity appear to be considered important causes.

Discussion

It appears that everybody is ambivalent about everything almost all of the time.  This universal expression of undecidedness is possibly an expression of freedom of choice.  The ambivalence is most prominent during crisis (Kairos), a critical time of potential change. Pregnancy is such a crisis.  It necessitates an expansion of the whole system into which the developing infant is placed.  The mother's body must expand to accommodate the growing baby. Similarly her mind must grow to incorporate another entity. This Crisis of Incorporation involves every member of the family and the family's network.  Because the mother is a key figure, she must be supported, otherwise her ambivalence about deciding for herself or for her infant and family becomes heightened.  Without support, this Survival Dilemma tilts toward narcissism, and thus the infant, seen as a parasite, is destroyed.

Abortion appears to have a greater impact than other types of pregnancy losses.  It results in more prolonged grief; possibly because of the greater turmoil regarding the continuation of the pregnancy, and possibly because abortions are more difficult to mourn.  Grieving an abortion may be more difficult for a woman because:

1) She has contributed to the loss she must now grieve. 

2) She does not have an opportunity to hold and examine her baby's body and thus cannot incorporate the baby into her being. 

3) She has dehumanised the infant and rejected part of herself the baby represents. 

4) Her grief is not supposed to be a real event, even though she feels the loss in her mind and body. 

5) Friends and relatives tend to make her feel uncomfortable for wanting to talk about this particular kind of loss.

6) There are few professionals interested in talking about pregnancy losses (particularly those from abortion) and even fewer who are trained to do it.

 Apart from poor bonding, lack of breastfeeding and increased risk of mistreatment, children who are abortion survivors may also suffer from survivor guilt, existential anxiety, anxious attachment, pseudo-secret collusion, distrust, self doubt, and ontological guilt. These conflicts and symptoms may be expressed through intense anger in the following ways and for the following reasons:

1.anger at their parents because their existence is dangled on the end of the weak thread of wantedness.

2.they have no sense of intrinsic worth and therefore others are not worthy.

3.they feel there is no right for them to exist, so no one else has that right either, especially if one is not wanted.  It is not hard to create the impression that people are less than human, and therefore not wanted.  Terms used in the Press, e.g. "rightists," first progressively dehumanises children and consequently makes it easy to terminate them.

4.they re-enact their own early surviving by a thread by endangering themselves repeatedly.

5.with all their questions about their own existence, they use self injury to reassure themselves they are still alive.  "Pain and blood show that I am alive."

6.because the existential anxiety is so great, they cannot tolerate waiting for the worst so they tend to make it happen before it happens to them.

7.they are told by parents who have had an abortion to be careful, so they want to break out and become carefree.

 Children also feel anger because:

1.they are being deprived of the security they needed in order to develop.  Therefore they seek to establish their own security by possessing knives and guns and karate.

2.they take on their parents' guilt to relieve their parents' distress.

3.they do abortions literally or figuratively on themselves because it is too threatening to believe their parent did it. 

4.they tend to dehumanise their siblings and defend their parents.

5.they want to bond to their siblings,  because in unstable families siblings become important, but they are afraid that sibling might still be terminated by murderous parents.  Therefore, their bonding tends toward forming gangs.

6.there is unresolved grief for their dead sibling.  This produces depression, which they attempt to treat with drugs and dangerous distraction.

7.there is a rage at their impotent father who should have protected them.

8.they deny the mothering and fathering capacities within themselves and, if they become pregnant, promote abortions. 

Conclusion

To produce only wanted children compounds the problems of child abuse and neglect because:

1) Most wanted children know they have survived when unborn, unwanted siblings did not.  This leaves them affected by a constellation of conflicts which result in existential guilt, a sense of impending doom, difficulties in making attachments and commitments, self doubt and hopelessness.  These factors affect all the surviving siblings in a family. It is more difficult for survivors to desire children to nurture and guide.

2) Wanted children are not considered by society to be intrinsically worthy of being alive.  Because they have no intrinsic sense of worth, they do not value others or see any reason to conserve the environment for future generations.  They tend to become hedonistic and self-destructive with less concern for their neighbours.

3) It is impossible to carefully consider all the critical issues during the first few months of an untimely pregnancy when attempting to make a rational choice.  Mothers are not likely to obtain informed consent.  Therefore the question to continue or not to continue the pregnancy tends be decided on the basis of "rights", or how the mother feels at the moment, or coercion.  Often she is swayed by self-interested people.

4) Insisting on every child being wanted, which can only be determined by the mother, diminishes the amount of partner support. Partners are not likely to become attached to an unborn baby when they know he/she could be terminated without their awareness or consent at any time.  No one makes an attachment when there is a possibility of having to face a painful loss. Partners who have no right to restrain a woman from aborting their baby feel helpless. This results in anger and a rejection of the spouse which increases the chance she will have an abortion.

5) Wanted children are more likely to be mistreated because they tend to have higher expectations placed on them and consequently are more disappointing.  Wanted children may be given many tools and toys, but the neglect makes them more vulnerable and susceptible to abuse. 

References

1. Ney PG. "Child Abuse and Abortion" JCPA,1979.

2.Ney P.G., Moore C., McPhee J. & Trought P. "Child abuse:  A study of the child's perspective." Child Abuse Negl., 511-518, 1986.

3.Ney PG. "Does Verbal Abuse Leave Deeper Scars: A Study of Children & Parents", Can J Psychiatry 371-378, 1987.

4.Ney, PG. "Transgenerational Child Abuse", Child Psychiatry Hum Dev, 151-168, 1988.

5.Ney PG. "Triangles of Child Abuse: A Model of Maltreatment", Child Abuse Negl 363-373, 1988.

6.Ney PG. "Child Mistreatment: Possible Reasons for its Transgenerational Transmission", Can J Psychiatry 594-601, 1989.

7.Ney PG. Fung T. Wickett AR. "Child Neglect: The Precursor to Child Abuse", Pre- and Perinatal Psychology J, 95-112, 1993.

8.Ney PG. Fung T. Wickett AR. Beaman-Dodd C. "The Effects of Pregnancy Loss on Women's Health", Soc Sci Med 38(9), 1193-1200, 1994.