What
is The Matter with Women Nowadays Anyhow?
Philip G. Ney, MD, FRCP (C)
August 17, 2004
“They’re just sissies,” snorted my mother.
Elizabeth with aristocratic upbringing was pioneer, mother of
8 children, musician, preacher, an example of Christ’s gospel
and died at 93. She considered modern women to be complaining
sissies.
John*, 42yrs., from Regina, physician, musician, philosopher,
poet, teacher and sailor was divorced 3 times by women who aborted
his only children and left him financially impoverished. Still
he wants to have a family, but will never marry a North American
woman.
Bob*, 41yrs., from Edmonton, smart, gentle, skilled home builder,
carver, archer, canoeist was married twice to women who ran off
with another man. They took his children and his tools, then filed
bogus assault charges so he was prevented from having any contact
with his beloved little ones.
James* 38yrs., living in Vancouver, raised by a violent mother,
married a combative woman who verbally and physically attacked
him whenever there was a disagreement. He was no wimp but knew
the consequences of hurting a woman. On one occasion while trying
to fend off his wife, his thumb accidentally went into her mouth.
She bit down hard. When in pain he suddenly pulled his thumb out,
he pulled out 2 of her teeth also. She phoned the police who on
seeing blood from her mouth quickly concluded he was at fault
and put him in prison.
Joe* 28yrs., when in Calgary, during an argument laid hands on
his wife, without threat, force or harm. She phoned the police,
“to teach you a lesson”. They put him in handcuffs
and led him away in front of neighbours and friends. They “accidentally”
had the cruiser speaker on while phoning in their report so the
onlookers could know what a dastardly thing he had done.
[*Identities changed to ensure anonymity but the stories are
true]
Of course there are just as many occasions in which men hurt
women. There is no reason to believe one sex is inherently more
evil than the other. Women with their greater verbal facility
can deeply wound a man with words. Feeling frustrated in their
verbal combat, men too often slink off or fly into rages. I know
of nobody that has been imprisoned for verbally assaulting her
husband. I have considerable evidence that verbal abuse is generally
more damaging than physical abuse. One way to help explain that
observation is that people tend internalize verbal abuse and use
the same hurtful words on themselves. Part of the difficulty for
police and courts is that words don’t result in wounds that
are easily detected.
No, I’m not a misogynist. I have neither fear of or anger
at women. I am generally supportive and encouraging to women.
My daughters, indeed all the women in my family are very intelligent
professionals having or having had successful careers. Because
I am a psychotherapist who specializes in treating disorders that
mainly affect women, I have spent many thousands of hours listening
to women from every socio-economic condition, from many cultural
backgrounds and of every age. After 40+ years of practice, I must
conclude my mother had a point. Maybe modern women are sissies.
Women of this age have rights, freedoms, education, opportunities,
houses, gadgets, labour saving devices and money to spend that
were inconceivable 100 years ago. Yet they complain more and show
no evidences of being happier than their grandmothers. The situation
for men hasn’t changed much. They are still expected to
die in battle for their family and freedom. Men have a higher
rate of suicide and have more stress diseases. They still do the
dirty jobs in mines, collecting garbage and changing a flat tire
in the rain while increasingly women hold administrative positions
in clean air-conditioned offices. In North America, women hold
most of the wealth, spend approximately 80% of the circulating
dollars have the majority of votes partly because they live 6-8
yrs longer than men. Because of their wealth and voting power,
the government and the media pander to them. Yet still they want
“affirmative action” to give them an unfair advantage
over men in gaining important jobs and entrance to professional
schools but the courts still hold them responsible for being the
financial support for the mates and children.
Women have less chance of having a learning disability but learn
in situations much more suited to their anatomy and physiology.
Women have shorter sentences than men for the same crime. They
have privileges in prison denied to men and are less likely to
have a death sentence. Women are allowed to have only women institutions
eg. Women’s Hospitals, that men are not allowed to have.
Women still have more contact with small children and thus have
a greater impact than men on the attitudes that shape society.
Women are more likely to gain custody in disputes over children.
Most importantly, only women can decide which preborn child lives
and which one dies by abortion. Yet women wonder why men are abdicating
their family duties and fleeing either into the wilderness or
into each other’s arms. Are women happier for all this?
No, there is a creeping malaise that no psychotherapy can touch.
It is just possible the problem arises from a growing discrepancy
between women’s design and function. Maybe they were designed
to be ‘help-mates’ rather than partners and child
raisers rather than bread winners. Maybe they would be happier
putting their heart and mind into understanding and nurturing
children and encouraging their husbands to make the world a better
place.
Of course it’s all men’s fault. They have lost their
God-given direction. Who wants to follow someone who doesn’t
know where he is going and what he is doing?
The possible remedy, at least part of it, is so incomprehensible
to some women that they would not even consider it. Were our fore
mothers and fathers so stupid they could not see how “progressive”
it was to have women work for the state and industry. I guess
they must have been, for they discouraged women working by having
a major pay differential in favour of men. The Communists were
the most “progressive” and pushed women into the work
force with the idea that if you doubled the work force you would
double production. It didn’t seem to work. Not only that,
there was such rampant drug and alcohol abuse among the young
people that were forced to conclude that families were important
after all. By the early 60ies the USSR was trying to encourage
women back into their homes with work restrictions and pay differentials.
Of course wise North Americans had nothing to learn by the Soviet
failure and so are determined to repeat that folly. Where are
the western legislators that have the brass to declare this system
isn’t working?
It seems that women got us into this mess and the women will
have to get us out. It is time for all godly women to shout loud
enough to those seeking power, “If we want any kind of sanity
or progress in our society, children must come first. My sisters
and I will not vote for you unless you make the first right of
every child is to be and to become all that God intended for him
and her. This means they need their mothers. We are going to stay
home with our young until they are mature enough to fend for themselves.
You must make it to our advantage to do so. To make that possible,
our husbands will have to be sufficiently well paid to support
us and still have time for themselves, us and our children. And
stop affirmative action. If women can’t compete on equal
terms, they are sissies. We are not sissies, do you hear”.